Friday, February 25, 2011

Dear Dude-On-A-Random-150cc-Bike-With-An-Ugly-Red-Skull-Cap-And-A-TN-License-Plate

Dear Dude-On-A-Random-150cc-Bike-With-An-Ugly-Red-Skull-Cap-And-A-TN-License-Plate,

First of all, get your goddamn helmet on and learn to stop at a red signal. I don’t usually talk to or waste my time on people who don’t even have respect for rules. It is because of you guys that the world is in chaos and honestly, you are almost a burden on this planet right now. 

Second of all, stop honking for no good reason and driving people crazy. What am I expected to do? Run into the guy crossing the street just when YOUR signal went green? I’m sorry it’s 10:30 pm and all that but we are all trying to get somewhere; in fact, you’re the one who’s not…the way you continue to amble down the road a while later. There are enough insane people on the roads and you’re just adding to the number. Get that right.

Image Courtesy: http://www.patsyclare.co.uk

What rank were you in class? 7th from the bottom or something? What is this desperate need to be first everywhere? Like you’re doing it to win your parents respect back. Get a life. Learn to wait. Accommodate (if you know what that means, with your poor academics).

Your status message (pardon the FB jargon) under your registration plate says ‘I’d rather walk alone’. You should. You should take that literally in fact and start walking instead of riding some random 150cc bike I couldn’t care less about and being an absolute jackass on the streets. Really. Do you even know what that means? Whatever it is that you’ve put on the behind of your bike?

TN37. Coimbatore. I’m sure you went to PSG. Please do yourself, your college, your city and your state some service by being nice to people rather than shouting at them in your defence. It makes me associate all those entities with people like you and you can be sure that is not a very positive thing. The next time I see a TN registration plate cut by rashly, I’m gonna go ‘Of course! TN!’ just like I do on seeing DL registration plates. And it’s all because of you. So please. Stop and start showing some respect for the legacy of the state you come from.

And please shave. The combination of that shabby look along with that ugly red skull cap makes you look like the hero of some cheap South Indian movie. The kind you watch in shady theatres…places where decent people would never bother to tread. And that’s why people like you in general should wear full face helmets at all points in time, not just while riding…so that people like me can keep from throwing up.

And you dare to talk back and defend your pathetic self to me after driving me so mad with all the above that all there is left is for me to kill you? You disgust me.

Not The Best Regards,
Me

4 Thinkers Pondered:

Nirupama said...

All I can say is, Same pinch!!
Keep writing! :)

Anonymous said...

Similar reflections. Hope atleast one rash driver who reads this cares to change.
- Dhinesh

Anonymous said...

I had even worse experience yesterday. Was going with a friend on 2wheeler (road next to Vodafone store opposite to Raheja arcade). few guys were standing in the middle of the road. Asked one of them to move aside. he moved aside and gave a serious look. went few metres and parked my bike. and these idiots came to us and tried to hit us for asking them to give way. Guess what language they are speaking!

And there was another incident few weeks ago where a person was cursing another biker on the road for not pulling aside and not giving him way to jump a red signal. So, there are lot of idiots on the road.

Shiju Sugunan said...

I think I've seen that guy. Crazy!